When my wife and I found out she was pregnant with our second child she broke down on the stairs and cried (God help us if Butter Cheeks ever reads this). Lest you judge too quickly – Flash was just 6 months old when it happened (surprise!) and we were in no way, shape, or form ready for another baby. We knew we wanted a second child… or maybe even a third… but all in good time. So the idea of having “two under two” wasn’t all that appealing at the time. I was a bit shocked, but after an initial moment of fear have to say that I was thrilled. After I gave her a big hug and expressed my excitement, I consoled my wife the only way most men know how: by being pragmatic and logical (you’d think I would’ve learned by now that pragmatism has no place in the throes of emotion… but alas, I am set in my ways). I explained that having two kids so close together is actually a good thing. No, it’s an AMAZING thing! They’ll have each other to play with, they’ll only be a year apart in school, they’ll (hopefully) be best friends, etc. But, I warned, the next 3 years are going to be tough. Like, really tough.
Flash was by all accounts a good baby. He was an incredible sleeper (12 hours through the night at 3 months), had an extremely content disposition, and was a pretty social little guy. And even after we brought his brother home, Flash was gentle, well behaved, and happy. But then when Flash turned 18 months, it was like a switch flipped. It was as if he was getting annoyed that this baby was still in his house (I swear I once heard him say “wait… you’re not returning that thing to the hospital?”). And for Flash, that was the beginning of the terrible twos. Hyperactive, bouncing off the walls, jealous to no end, and whiney (oh my God, whiney).
Butter Cheeks was a bit different. He never slept well. I think it took him 13 months before he actually slept 8 straight hours. But where Flash was content, Butter Cheeks was jolly. He laughed at everything. He was happy to observe situations and just let them play out in front of him – like we were all his own personal entertainment (or it could have just been that he didn’t want to be swept up in the dust storm that was Flash). And at 18 months, despite our fears that he was about to enter his terrible twos like his brother did – Butter Cheeks was still just as jolly.
Find out what's happening in Georgetownwith free, real-time updates from Patch.
Christmas of 2013 was a hard one because it was the first holiday season since we lost my wife’s mom, and Flash was just on fire. And it also marked the turning point for Butter Cheeks from jolly baby to tantrum throwing toddler. After a few weeks of both boys wearing us down, my wife and I were about to pull our hair out. It got to a point that I actually asked my mom what she thought we were doing wrong as parents. We knew we weren’t the only people in the world to ever have kids; and that our boys weren’t the only ones who acted out in their terrible twos… but for a few weeks it sure felt that way.
And then – Flash changed. Out of nowhere, he shed his terrible two skin and emerged a well adjusted pre-schooler. He began showing empathy for other people, helping around the house, playing with his little brother (instead of abusing him). And it didn’t come a moment too soon, because Butter Cheeks continued in the opposite direction. Did I mention that Flash used to be whiney? Well Butter Cheeks puts him to shame in that category. I don’t even remember what his normal voice sounds like anymore, haha. But at this point, we’re better at taking things in stride. With a glimpse of hope for the future after seeing Flash’s behavior improve dramatically, we know it’s only a matter of time before Butter Cheeks follows the same path. And when I do get stressed I just try and remember the words of solace I offered my wife when she was on the stairs crying – the first 3 years are going to be tough, but after that it’s going to be amazing.
